i am still here.
& life is still busy
& even when your kids are potty trained & can get their own snacks
there is still a lot to do in order to keep them alive.
i just wanted to check in & assure you (& me) that i am still dreaming & working.
i did not drown in the numbers (since that was my last 'show & tell' post, i can see why you might have thought that i had. but numbers? they don't scare me (much)!
& life is still busy
& even when your kids are potty trained & can get their own snacks
there is still a lot to do in order to keep them alive.
i just wanted to check in & assure you (& me) that i am still dreaming & working.
i did not drown in the numbers (since that was my last 'show & tell' post, i can see why you might have thought that i had. but numbers? they don't scare me (much)!
the honest truth is that while the dream is still alive & burning in my heart
(just ask me & i will talk ad nauseam about all of my ideas.
yes, you can feel sorry for my friends who innocently ask 'how's that thing your working on going?')
but sometimes i am tired of trying to figure out how to make it work.
did i tell you?
i found a space that i think will be perfect.
it's full of rooms just waiting for fun...
but it's all just stuck up in here, waiting for something to happen.
if you happen to see something could you let her know i'd like to schedule a meeting?
& then as i write that i know that most likely something is not going to come to me.
i have to go get something & put a little leash on her & feed her skittles so she will stay.
what was i talking about?
something.
(just ask me & i will talk ad nauseam about all of my ideas.
yes, you can feel sorry for my friends who innocently ask 'how's that thing your working on going?')
but sometimes i am tired of trying to figure out how to make it work.
did i tell you?
i found a space that i think will be perfect.
it's full of rooms just waiting for fun...
but it's all just stuck up in here, waiting for something to happen.
if you happen to see something could you let her know i'd like to schedule a meeting?
& then as i write that i know that most likely something is not going to come to me.
i have to go get something & put a little leash on her & feed her skittles so she will stay.
what was i talking about?
something.
& well, even though i feel like i have done lots of work already
work that i love
work that i want to do
i know that this is just the beginning.
& i guess i just wanted to admit that it's not all ideas & dreams.
sometimes it's boring planning
& lots of waiting to see
& a bit of, 'i'm too tired today'
& sometimes i read about people who stay in $1000 hotel suites i i think
'i just need you to stay at home or with a friend or go camping
& donate your hotel budget to me, just for a few months'
but
the same part of me who starts to get tired & wishes for someone to hand her a check has a twin
& that twin, i tell you what, she will not stop yacking.
on & on & on about what a great idea this is
& that if i can just power through, this will be just the thing.
just the thing that moms need.
just the thing that kids need.
just the thing that families need.
just the thing that i need.
she might be annoying, but that yacky twin?
she's right.
work that i love
work that i want to do
i know that this is just the beginning.
& i guess i just wanted to admit that it's not all ideas & dreams.
sometimes it's boring planning
& lots of waiting to see
& a bit of, 'i'm too tired today'
& sometimes i read about people who stay in $1000 hotel suites i i think
'i just need you to stay at home or with a friend or go camping
& donate your hotel budget to me, just for a few months'
but
the same part of me who starts to get tired & wishes for someone to hand her a check has a twin
& that twin, i tell you what, she will not stop yacking.
on & on & on about what a great idea this is
& that if i can just power through, this will be just the thing.
just the thing that moms need.
just the thing that kids need.
just the thing that families need.
just the thing that i need.
she might be annoying, but that yacky twin?
she's right.
so while at this point that very first picture up there is a pretty good representation of how i feel:
spray paint on a brick wall
with a funny little graffiti 'nope' off to the side
i also really love that picture
because
i.
am.
still.
here.
& i'm working on a little portfolio to show people
& i have some ideas for finding some money
& there are some people who want to talk about working together
& it is all right there.
i just have to make it happen.
i just get to make it happen.
& that makes me so happy to be
here.
still.
spray paint on a brick wall
with a funny little graffiti 'nope' off to the side
i also really love that picture
because
i.
am.
still.
here.
& i'm working on a little portfolio to show people
& i have some ideas for finding some money
& there are some people who want to talk about working together
& it is all right there.
i just have to make it happen.
i just get to make it happen.
& that makes me so happy to be
here.
still.